And then I realised
by bookworm59
Summary: For eighteen year old Claire Danvers life couldn't be better. Until everything starts to turn upside down. Pls R&R :  my second fan-fic much improved from my first I think. Claire's POV :D
1. Realization sucks

Sat over the toilet, throwing my guts up, I couldn't help but think I'd had better days. Shane poked his gorgeous head round the bathroom door a glass of water in his big hand and a small sympathetic smile on his mouth.

"Wash your mouth out, it'll make you feel better." I did as he suggested, running the tap until the water was ice cold and putting my head under it.

"I think I'm fine now. I probably just ate some bad food or something yesterday."

"Good 'cause Eve's moaning about needing her bathroom time and there's some breakfast on your bed starting to go cold…." He trailed off and I smiled at him, earning a light brush of his lips on my forehead.

I wondered into my room and stopped as I saw what was sitting on my bed. It was a small wooden tray holding two slices of buttered toast, a glass of orange juice, a bottle of Pepto-Bismol and a small glass vase holding a single red rose. It was so kind that I felt over whelmed by emotion and I was surprised when I felt fresh tears rolling down my cheeks.

"Claire, honey, what's wrong? Do you feel ill again 'cause I can kick Eve outa there if you need-" he didn't finish his sentence mainly because I smothered him in a hug, salty tears soaking into his thin grey t-shirt.

"I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you…" I continued murmuring to him around tear reduced hiccups. He rubbed my back in slow circles and kissed the crook of my neck.

"I love you, too, Claire. I will always love you. Now eat your breakfast, its going cold, while I ring Myrnin and tell him you're sick and you need the day off, okay?" I nodded, slowly munching on a piece of toast, while Shane flipped open my clamshell phone and scrolled through the contacts list.

He hit dial and raised the phone to his ear. "No, this isn't Claire." He said snappily "It's Shane. Her boyfriend. Claire's sick and she won't be able to make it into work today." He waited for a moment and then said in an even colder tone "Well, considering she's just been throwing up into the toilet for half an hour, I'm pretty sure. Yes, I'll tell her. Right. Bye." He hung up the phone and then said "Kisses!" to the blank screen.

He turned and smiled at me (a breath-taking sight) and said "No problamo. Mr-Boss-man says that he's disappointed that you can't come in today that he needed someone to feed bob- whoever the hell that is- and that he expects more from his assistant in future blah, blah, blah you get the picture."

He came over and sat next to me on the bed holding the bottle of Pepto-Bismol out to me. I took it but even the thought of consuming that thick pink liquid made me gag and sprint for the bathroom. I barged in, completely ignoring the protesting shouts of Eve who was applying make-up to herself in front of the mirror, and promptly threw up.

Eve looked down at me her nose wrinkled in disgust at my position over the toilet.

"Ew." She declared "I'm pretty there's some pepto around here somewhere if you want-" But I shook my head weakly at the word 'pepto' so she plopped beside me put an arm around my shoulders and handed me the glass of water Shane had earlier given to me.

"You do look a bit pasty-and yes this is coming from the girl who covers her face in rice powder make up every day- maybe you should lie down. Its only eight o' clock in the morning for Christ's sake. Your probably tired. Get some rest, you'll feel better later on. And, well, your eighteen now and after your first proper hangover this will be like child's play. You should probably get used to throwing up." She said giving my shoulders a light squeeze before she zoomed of to get dressed and have yet another mug of coffee.

When I walked back into my room Shane was sprawled across my bed chewing the discarded crusts of off my toast. He looked up when I entered the room.

"Better?" he asked concern making his eyes twinkle. I gave a non-committal shrug and sat down next to him.

"I think I will be, I just need to get dressed and have some fresh air." I waited for him to leave but he stayed sprawled on my bed, his hands clasped behind his head, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

I raised my eyebrows and pointed at the door. He raised one eyebrow and looked me up and down, making me giggle.

"I'm going to get dressed. Out."

"You wonder why I wasn't leaving."

I rolled my eyes and pointed at the door again. "Shoo. Perv…" he laughed came up behind me and kissed the tip of my ear as a goodbye and jogged out of the room. I sighed as I watched him go, not being able to stop myself checking out his butt as he walked down the hall. Much.

I shoved on a pair of three-quarter-lengths, a tight long sleeved red V-neck and a pair of grubby high-tops. Then I walked down the hall to Shane's room knocked once and then entered. Lucky for me he was just sliding on a fresh t-shirt giving me the chance to appreciate the awesomeness of his torso while I waited. He spun round quickly, too quickly as he caught me checking him out, and then asked "Hey! No fair, how come I don't get to see you without a shirt?"

I laughed but ignored his question. "Hey I'm walking down to the pharmacy to pick up something for my stomach. You need anything?"

"Well let's see, I'm all out of aspirin and I could do with some deodorant. But that should be about it. Oh-and I'm fresh out of tampons." I rolled my eyes and calmly informed him that he could by his own things if he was going to be cheeky. He shot me a lop-sided grin before I stepped out of his room and walked through the house making a list of things needed by my fellow housemates, before I walked out the door into the sweltering heat of Texas.

The pharmacy was small but had all the essentials packed into the tiny space. I grabbed a basket from the stack by the door and wondered around the shop, filling it with toiletries. Wondering round the isles, I stopped dead in my tracks as I saw what was on the next shelf. Almost as though I was in a trance, I grabbed one of the little white boxes and started working things out in my head. I'd been so preoccupied by everything going on-and believe me something's always going on in Morganville-I hadn't paid attention to the trivial things. Hadn't realised that my period was ten days late.

Hastily, I shoved the box in my basket making sure it was covered by all my other items before I walked towards the till. The middle aged at the checkout women scanned my items silently, raising her eyebrows when she saw the carefully concealed box but otherwise making no comment.

I thanked her and exited the little shop as I walked down the street, only having enough self-control to stop myself from running down the street.

I managed to enter the house and lock myself in the bathroom before anyone had noticed my presence. I plucked the pregnancy test out of the plastic bag, read the instructions on the back of the box and did the unavoidable.

I shut my eyes for three whole seconds then slowly prized open one eye to look at the result.


	2. Oh God

The world was spinning. I shut my eyes and counted to one hundred before opening my eyes again. I gripped the edge of the sink for support and looked down at the pregnancy test again. The world had stopped spinning, but that little pink plus hadn't changed. I took in was shaky breath and sank to the cold floor. Then it kicked in.

Oh my God.

I'm pregnant.

With Shanes baby.

!

The sound of the door smacking against the wall was like a gunshot ripping through the air. I jerked with such violence it was like I had been electrocuted.

"Damn, girl!" shouted Eve putting a black finger nailed hand on her heart. "Scared the hell out of me, I didn't even know you were home! Hey….are you oook? You look a little….shaken….." then she spotted what was in my hand.

"Oh. My. Fucking. God." She whispered "is that a pregnancy test?" slowly, I nodded hot tears pouring down my face. She wrenched it out of my hands and peered at the result, letting out a little gasp when she saw it.

"Oh God. Oh God, Oh God, Oh God, Oh God, Oh God. Ok, calm, right. The biggest question here is what are you going to do? I mean, are you going to get an abortion?" I shook my head franticly clutching at my flat (for now, at least) stomach. How could I kill the child that was living inside of me? The answer was simple. I couldn't. Ever.

"Alright then, next question. What about adoption?" I sighed, but realised I needed to make up my mind now rather than letting the questions fly around in my brain like a swarm of angry bees.

"Here's the thing Eve. I can't think of anything to do other than keep it. Every other option seems unacceptable. But, what if we don't have the money to give it a good childhood? And we're so young still-and-and-"

"Claire, just stop, ok? You're panicking for no reason. Your job with Myrnin gets more income than the rest of us put together. And, yes you and Shane are still young-you're both eighteen now but still-but you are the smartest girl I know. And-and you and Shane are going to make great parents"

That's when it got too much for both of us. We both burst into tears for so many reasons-tears of worry, tears of frustration, tears of happiness-and clutched each other in wet hugs.

When we had finished crying Eve looked at me with a sensible expression-which by the way is frigging hilarious when the girl doing it has a great quantity of running mascara and eye-liner dried onto her face-and said simply "You need to tell Shane." And that was all it took to shake me back into reality.

I sat cross-legged on the plush carpet of my room, gripping the pregnancy test and focusing on controlling my breathing-which, I discovered, was a useless exercise, as the second I heard the unmistakable thump of footsteps coming down the hall I started hyperventilating again.

A sliver of artificial light shone through the crack in the door as Shane poked his head round. He grinned and came in, scooping me up in his arms for a moment, before setting me back down and kissing me on the forehead.

"Hey, baby, where've you been? I haven't seen you since you went to the pharmacy and that was aaaaaaaaaaages ago." His voice slowed into a quiet murmur as he spotted what was in my hand.  
>"Claire," he said softly "What is that?"<p>

"It's a pregnancy test, Shane." I said barely able to stop my voice from quivering.

"Is it-?"

"It's positive. We're going to have a baby Shane." Slowly, he sank down onto my bed his elbows resting on his knees and his palms pressed into his face. His chest rose once, twice, three times before he lifted his head and looked at me.

"We're going to have a baby." He said suppressed joy in his shining eyes. Ok, well I wanted to wait until the right time-and I don't want you to think this is just because of what you just told me, 'cos it's not-I've been planning on-this for months and-but now-" he seemed to realise that words weren't doing anything for him, so he got down onto one knee and took out a little velvet box from his back pocket and flipped open the lid.

The tears in my eyes were almost as bright as the diamond.


	3. That went well

I shivered against the swirling darkness of the portal but stepped through anyway. I heard a gasp as I was thrown out onto my butt, on the thickly carpeted floor of Amelie's office.

"Claire!" she said a hind of surprise in her usually indifferent voice "What are you doing here? Are you in trouble? Are your friends? Is it Myrnin? Is it-" I interrupted her questions with a quick statement.

"Amelie, I'm pregnant." See quick and painful as the old saying goes. Or is it quick and painless? Ah, well.

To my surprise Amelie broke into a brilliant smile and hugged me. I'm not even joking. Then she pulled back still gripping the tops of my shoulders and said "Can I feel?" she asked her hands gesturing towards my stomach.

"Erm, there's no real definition of a bump yet, but, sure." Amelie put her slender hands on my still flat stomach and shot me a smile of pure joy.

"Amelie, can I ask you something?" she nodded, adjusting her pale blond hair in a small mirror on the wall. "Well, I thought you'd be mad, because I'll have to take so much time off work and-"

"Claire, if you're asking why I'm not mad, it's because, well, you're like a daughter to me. And, even though I class all residents of Morganville as my children, I feel that I have grown fond of you." A lump formed in my throat as she spoke. I mean, sure I expect Eve and Michael to react this way but Amelie? I would have never expected that. But as soon as it had come, she returned to her usual state of cool indifference.

"Claire, I'll call Myrnin and let him know about your situation. Welcome to nine months of freedom." She said with a smile.

"What? Are you saying that I've got-? That I'm on maternity leave? For nine months? Starting now? I mean, I'm happy but, I don't even have a bump yet. And Myrnin will be-"

"Let me worry about Myrnin, because, Claire, do you honestly think that the fumes inhaled in Myrnin's lab are safe for a pregnant woman? No. Don't worry, you'll be on paid leave. Now on your way. Oh and tell Mr. Collins congratulations on the engagement." She said with a small smile.

Absentmindedly I fingered the diamond solitaire on my left hand with a tiny smile, before stepping through the portal with a wave in Amelie's direction.

I landed squarely in the middle of the living room, feeling a little surprise when I saw everyone sitting scattered around the room anxiety displayed on each of their faces. They jumped up when they saw me arrive, out of what would appear to be right out of mid-air.

"What did she say? Amelie?" said Eve biting down hard on her lip, which had a coating of blood-red lipstick.

"She was…happy. Ecstatic, in fact. And I have maternity leave….starting now." They jumped up and started whooping and skipping around. Shane grabbed me and twirled me around in a large circle. He set me down and kissed the engagement ring, and then my stomach.

"She said something about the fumes I inhale in Myrnin's lab not being suitable for a pregnant woman. Oh and did I mention she gave me about nine months _paid _maternity leave?" This made Michael and Shane whoop louder but Eve sighed.

"Oliver wouldn't give _me_ nine months paid time off, even if I was dying." She sighed while I grinned smugly.

Shane was still beaming like a maniac so I turned to him and said "You better lose the smile, and look ashamed. We have to go tell my parents." That seemed to wipe the smile off his face.

_Myrnin_

I crumpled the phone I was holding with a curling of my fist. As it shattered little electric shocks shot up my arm but I was so angry that I didn't care. Slowly I unclenched my fist and let the mangled piece of plastic fall to the floor. Reaching forward, I grabbed the spindly wooden chair I sometimes sat on to read, and threw it as hard as I could against the wall, with a roar of pure fury.

Beakers were shattered, books torn apart, desks split into small pieces. Eventually, everything in my lab was broken, but there was one thing I still longed to break. The boy. The boy who had implanted _my_ Claire with _his_ child. The boy who she was about to be bonded to in holy matrimony. The boy I wanted nothing more than to snap his neck.

But then I imagined Claire's face, streaked with tears as her lover lie dead. But I couldn't do anything to hurt her.

I reached up to brush my hair of my face, surprising myself when I felt tears there. Now that I had stopped destroying things, I could feel my heart breaking.

_Claire_

"I'm sorry dear, what did you say?" My mother said making a cupping notion near her ear. I couldn't hear over the television-_which shouldn't be on when we have guests! _It's rude." The last part she addressed to my father, who to my horror shut the T.V. off altogether.

"I said- I said- I said- I'm pregnant." I spluttered. My Dad stood up clenching his fists.

"Did he do this to you?" he asked gesturing to Shane who was sat on the sofa, trying to look innocent.

"You're saying it like he raped me, Dad. Everything we-err-'did', it was of my own choice."

"Yes, Claire, I'm not denying that, but now look. Now you have to make a choice, an abortion or adoption. Either way there is a lot of emotional and physical pain here, that's going to take place-"

"Dad, I'm keeping the baby." I said in outrage.

My mother frowned at me and said "But, dear, you're only a child. You can't possibly-" I lifted my left hand and shoved it first in my Mum's face then in my dad's.

"I'm not a kid anymore. I'm eighteen, and free to make my own decisions. And another thing, you better get used to the idea of me and Shane, 'cause, to be frank, if you're not then you won't be invited to the wedding." I grabbed Shane's hand and pulled him out the door.

"That went well." It just wouldn't be right without Shane making some kind of joke.


	4. It's all working out

"Claire….you look-soo-bea-beautiful." My mother spluttered out around loud tears. It was the day of the wedding and I had just come downstairs and into the living room to see my parents. Both had got over their 'you're too young' phase pretty fast. I think Mum just couldn't resist a good old wedding to organise.

It was exactly a month after the engagement, and it was the year mark for the day when Shane and I had officially started dating. We thought it would be more romantic. And, yes, ok, it's a little rushed because we didn't want a baby bump getting in the way of the perfect dress.

It was a pure clean white, strapless thing that hugged the top part of my torso and then puffed out into layers and _layers_ of this netting stuff that classed as a skirt. Matching veil. I felt classy and elegant and adult in it. I was so happy.

My dad stood up, gave me a hug, and then slipped a pair of car keys into my hand. I looked down at them, then at him.

"Dad…?" he held up a hand to silence me.

"It's something old and, I want it back, so it's something borrowed." I looked out of the window and saw parked up in our drive an old black, _beautiful_ car with huge pink ribbons tied to it.

"When did you get it?" I asked staring out at it in awe.

"A few months ago. I was driving round when I saw it, growing rust, sat in this old guy's back yard. I wanted to buy it but he said I could take it so long as I got it out of his garden in the next thirty seconds. He was sick of looking at it, apparently."

My Mother, oblivious to the conversation between me and my Dad, stood up four fingers held up. "So that's something old and borrowed, the dress is new, so all you need is something blue."

"That's where I come in." a voice said from the stairs. I turned around to see Eve skipping down the stairs in a navy blue knee length dress, strappy silver shoes and nail varnish to match. Make-up was a bare minimum, of lip gloss and a sweep of mascara. She looked beautiful.

"As your maid of honour I nominate myself to be your something blue," she said tugging on the navy dress. As we closed in a tight hug she whispered in my ear "And I didn't think you'd want your parents to see this." She pressed something into my hand and I looked down to see a blue and white silk garter in my hand. I smiled as I thought of the red and black lacy underwear I was wearing under the beautiful wedding dress. But that would have to wait.

"Where's Michael?" I asked looking around. I hadn't seen him since yesterday when Shane had packed off to stay at one of Morganville's hotels-it's bad luck to see the bride on the wedding morning.

"Oh, he stayed with Shane at the hotel, you know to reminisce. So basically to watch a SAW marathon and talk about how hot their girlfriends are." She said with a wink. Then she dragged me upstairs to do my hair and make-up. My hair in loose curls and my make-up done to perfection we ventured downstairs and decided it was time to go.

Shane and I had been to one to many funerals at the chapel for it to feel right to get marred there, with all the sad memories. So we had decided to do up one of the bare patches of land surrounding Morganville and have the wedding there. Myrnin had widened the boundaries of town for us especially-well Frank had, I think it was the most he could do for his son on his wedding day. Father Joe had agreed to do the ceremony and everything had just…worked out. For once in my screwed up life in Morganville I felt like everything was falling into place.

"We're here!" said Eve her voice bursting with excitement. I stepped out of the car and gasped in shock. The usual bare dessert landscape was covered in lush green grass. An aisle ran down the middle of closely packed together chairs and at the end there was a sculpted arch intertwined with honeysuckle and roses.

Under the arch stood Father Joe and my Shane. The Shane that has never once failed to come to my side. The Shane that, if I'm honest, I've been crushing on since I first moved into the Glass House. My Shane.

My dad took passed me a large bouquet of flowers, lilies, took my arm and walked me down the aisle.

Der, de, de, da, der, de, de, da…..the sound was right but I was confused as to where it was coming from, as there was no piano in sight. Stood up at the front in the maid of honours position, I saw Eve holding up a small iPod which was projecting the tune across the area. I gave her a look and she shot me a 'what can you do?' shrug, right before my Dad placed my hand into Shanes. My eyes blurred over just as Father Joe began to talk.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today…" he continued to speak (Eve gazing moonily at him) but when I looked into Shanes face and Father Joes words didn't matter to me. I was marrying my prince and I was getting my happy ending. He was first to read his vows.

"You know most people, in their vows make up some crap that everyone knows never applied to them. But before I read my vows I want you to know that every word of them is true. When I first met you Claire, you were this skinny little kid sporting the colours black and blue. And I felt this overwhelming need to protect you. But every time I tried you'd remind me that you were the toughest person in the world. Still, every day since I have told you to shut up and deal with the fact that I'm here to protect you." This earned a laugh from the crowd and I felt a hot ear trickle down my face. Thank God for waterproof mascara. "I've never really had much good in my life and-" his voice shook and I saw wet drops splat onto his crumpled speech. He took a deep breath and continued "and you are the best thing that's ever happened to me. I love you, soo much, and I will make it my priority to keep you safe."

The onlookers sighed a collective _ahh_ and then it was my turn.

"I found it very difficult to write this speech. I mean how the hell am I supposed to sum up our relationship? But, well here it goes. When I first met you, you were on the sofa, no shoes or socks, in this tattered old t shirt and fraying jeans. And I thought- 'slacker'. But the more I got to know you the more I realised how wrong I was. I, mean, yeah, sometimes you lay around the house all day playing video games-and once you slept until two in the afternoon. But you made it your full time occupation to look after anyone and everyone who needs it. You've changed me, Shane, in ways even you can't imagine. When I'm with you I don't feel like your typical geeky girl anymore-despite the fact I learn about things most of you in here don't even know exist. You make me feel like someone who's worth something. And I love you for all of that." I looked up at Shane, and he was smiling, despite the tears that were falling over his full lips.

I was crying too, barely able to splutter out an 'I do'.

"By the power of vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride." Shane bent his head and placed his lips tenderly to mine, ignorant of the flashing cameras. And, for once, everything was perfect.

"Ready?" I asked turning my head to look at the crowd of girls, stood in their dresses, hunger alight in their faces. My question was greeted by vigorous nods, so I turned back around and threw the bouquet at them. I heard a chorus of shrieks and thuds (most likely as people were pushed over) followed by a yelp of surprise.

Spinning round, I saw a blushing Hannah Moses with the bouquet of flowers in her hands. She was wearing an olive green knee-length dress that looked amazing with her skin tone. To my surprise Richard Morrell walked up to Hannah with a smile and kissed her affectionately on the cheek. I raised my eye brows at her and she grinned-her white teeth startling against her tan complexion.

The rest of the day passed in a blur. Shane removed my blue garter with his teeth-making me shiver in pleasure when his lips brushed my leg. I ate my own body weight in cake (so, about the same amount as Shane would have usually ate) overcome by a craving for it. Gift, after gift was given, tears were shed and hugs and manly backslaps were shared.

However, everything went from blurry to slow motion when Monica Morrell showed up, Gina and Jennifer flanking her.

"What the _hell _are you doing here?" I asked. She had most defiantly _not _been on the guest list.

"Just giving my congratulations to the happy couple." She said. If her presence alone wasn't making me angry enough, the fact that she was wearing white just topped it off. "Heard you were pregnant. Nothing more romantic than a shotgun wedding." She stage whispered while Gina and Jennifer sniggered. Big. Mistake.

"Ok, Monica, you are not ruining _my_ day. Every single day of the year you have people staring at you but for once it's _my turn._ So you can leave now, on your terms, or you can leave now plus a big chunk missing from your reputation as queen bitch. Your choice."

She looked at her lipstick mafia, then pursed her lips and shook her brunette head. "No I don't think we want to. You see we only just got here and there's so much more _fun _to be had."

"Alrighty then." I said calmly. Then I punched her in the face and broke her perfectly straight nose. Amazingly, no blood got on me, but her, Gina and Jenifer got soaked in it. Without a look back, they ran off, Monica clutching her shattered nose, groaning in pain.

Now Shane, Michael, Eve and I were sat on the grass watching the sun set. Shane's tuxedo jacket was around my shoulders and Michael's around Eve's. The insects were chirping softly and all was well in the world. After around half an hour of this, the sun was almost set and we decided we better not push our luck-after all two smitten couples sitting around at this time of night was easy pickings for a hungry vamp (even with Michael with us). To my surprise Eve and Michael didn't come towards my borrowed wedding car, but veered left towards Michael's car.

"Don't you want to come home with us? You can pick up the car tomorrow." I said.

"Oh, we're not going home. We're staying at a hotel. We thought that we should give the happy couple some, err, privacy." Michael replied, while Eve suppressed giggles.

"Yeah, unlike you guys, we we're actually hoping to get some sleep tonight." She said, snorting with laughter. I blushed and Shane brushed his lips against our interlocked hands. We waved at them and then stepped into the car.

We drove in confortable silence, listening to each other's breathing. When Shane pulled into the driveway he got out in record time and zoomed round to my side of the car. He scooped me up in his big arms and I gave a yelp in surprise and joy. He lifted me over the threshold then carefully placed me down onto my own two feet.

He kissed the wedding band then placed his lips on mine. Without taking my mouth away from his I said "Meet me in my room, I'm going to slip into something less comfortable." I then pelted up the stairs and locked myself in the bathroom.

I unzipped the pristine wedding dress and shimmied out of it. I stared at the full length mirror that Eve had mounted to the wall. The girl there was wearing red and black lacy bra and matching pants. Thigh-high fishnet stockings, elongating her short legs. She shook her black/brown loosely curled hair out. Her brown eyes were alight with glee. The girl was me.

I entered my room, enjoying watching Shanes eyes pop out of his head as he feasted his eyes on me. He crooked a finger at me and I sashayed towards him, my hips swaying. He placed his hand at the small of my bare back and I asked "How do I look?" with a bat of my eyelashes. In answer he pulled me flush against him and nuzzled my neck with a small moan. I giggled and fell back against the bed, pulling him back with me.

And everything was…good.

_Thanks for your comments guys! There all really nice! Do you like Hannah and Richard as a couple? Please comment, sorry it's taken so long to update, took ages to finish this story ;) R&R _


	5. Please God no

"Does this make the bump look smaller?" I asked modelling a grey baby-doll t shirt. I was in my room the entire contents of my closet strewn in various places across the room. Shane was sprawled on my bed telling me which items of clothing, first of all, still fit me properly and, second of all, which items made the baby bump look smaller. I was five months pregnant and the bump was not _huge,_ but it had a sure definition to it.

"No." replied Shane while I sighed and slipped of the top. "However I'm partial to this look." He said gesturing at where i was stood in only a jeans and bra. I rolled me eyes and pulled out a purple panelled sun-dress from the immense pile of clothing. I slipped it on and shimmied of my jeans to the applause of Shane.

"And we have a winner! It makes the bump look smaller and fits well." I smiled and continued to try on combination after combination of clothes to the steadily more weary comments from Shane.

Eventually we had sorted everything into two piles of 'yes I can wear this now' and 'wear after the baby comes'.

Sliding back into my original outfit of a red stretchy t shirt and grey jogging bottoms, I pulled Shane downstairs.

"Shaaaaaaaaaaaane…." I said sitting on the long sofa.

"Yeeees…?" he said warily

"You know, I love you?"

"Yes, what do you need?" he said with a grin.

"Can you get me a glass of orange juice?"

"We don't have any, in but I'll run to the store and get you some." He said without hesitation. That's why I love that man. We kissed goodbye and I heard Eve wolf whistle as we did so. Shane flipped her off.

It had been half an hour and Shane hadn't come back, so I was guessing he was stocking up on snack products for himself. Suddenly hungry, I ventured into the kitchen and decided exactly what I wanted to eat.

I grabbed a glass bowl broke some chocolate into it, then put some water in a pan to boil and placed the bowl on top of it. I then pondered the freezer and came up with a pack of bacon, which I shoved under the grill.

"That is probably the most disgusting thing I've ever seen." Said Eve ten minutes later, spotting me sat on the floor of the living room, where I was consuming rashers of bacon dipped in chocolate. "And that includes the time I saw Monica Morrell with her tongue in one of the 50 year old TPU professors ears, to get him to give her an A…well maybe not a disgusting as that, but still pretty disgusting."

"Sorry…" I mumbled around a delicious mouthful.

"Did you get a craving for it or something?" she asked looking down on me in disapproval and revulsion.

"That's the thing. I don't think I got an actual craving, it was more like I knew I should be getting weird cravings so I, like, made myself want it. Besides, it's delicious" I said, while she frowned.

"Ah, well, maybe you're just a freak." She said with a wink, just as Shane walked through the door hollering "Heeeeeeeeeelllllllooooooooooo! Any live ones in here-no offence Mikey." Michael, who was tuning his guitar in his favourite armchair, rolled his eyes while I jumped up to greet my boyfriend.

Shane was in the kitchen a carton of orange juice in his hand.

"Yey!" I yelled and rapped my arms around his neck to kiss him-hard. The sound of someone clearing their throat made us break apart.

I spun around and saw Amelie standing there, prim and proper with her hands clasped behind her back and an _enormous _present wrapped in pink wrapping paper sitting next to her.

"Amelie!" I said in surprise, hastily erasing chocolate of the sides of my mouth with my tongue.

"Hello, Claire. Mr. Collins, Miss. Rosser." She said with a nod to each of them. "Claire, I didn't bring my gift to the wedding because well I didn't know how many people you'd told about the pregnancy and I thought people would ask questions. Since then I haven't really had the time to give this to you, but, seeing as I had some spare time today, I thought I'd drop this off." She said gesturing to the present. I have no idea how she got into the house with a present that huge without us noticing, but I was too busy tearing the paper off of the gift to care right at that moment.

The cot was beautiful. It was painted white, with a small mattress lining the bottom. A multi-coloured patchwork quilt was laid over the top of it and a small white pillow was at the head of the crib. I felt tears prick at my eyes as I thought of all the other gifts Shane and I had received. The baby clothes, the toys, the multi packs of pampers (seriously, someone actually bought that for us) but this meant so much more.

"Amelie, I don't know what to say, it's beautiful-how can I- how can I ever repay you-"

"Nonsense, Claire, it was a gift. I only want one thing in return. May I?" she asked glancing at my stomach.

"Of course!" I said. To my surprise she did not lower her hands to my stomach, but her ear. When she stood back up her face was grim.

"What is it?" Shane asked, reading her expression.

"I couldn't hear the baby's heart-beat." She said her voice barely above a whisper. "Claire, I think there is a good chance you have miscarried."

I felt my face crumple with misery as I fell onto my knees and I gagged on my own sobs. Shane had fallen to the floor too and he was murmuring 'No, no, no, no, no…" continuous whispers. Eve reached forward and tried to grip my hand but I flinched away from her, my tears expelling themselves in gut wrenching sobs. Shane and I locked eyes for half a second, before I clutched him a hug, salt water falling freely down my cheeks.

_Yes I know kind of morbid, but i'm going to do a 'In 10 years time' chapter next and maybe things will pick up in the future. R&R peeps :) _


	6. 15 years later

_15 years later_

"Happy fourteenth birthday, Luce!" I said closing my daughter in a hug. They second I released Lucy, Shane engulfed her in a hug too and I could see her squirming slightly.

"Thanks Mom-thanks Dad. Ok get off me now."

"Hey" said Shane levelling a finger at her "Just because your fourteen now doesn't mean you can be cheeky."

"I _know_ Dad." She said rolling her heavily mascaraed eyes "And from what Mom's told me about _you _when _you_ were younger, you were twice as cheeky as I'll ever be." Then she clomped up the stairs to add some rice powder make-up to her complexion.

"Hey," Shane said looking at me "You can't tell them about what I was like when I was younger. It gives them a get-out-of-jail-free card." I rolled my eyes and kissed him, just as our ten year old (Silver) and our six year old (Alex) walked through into the living room.

"Ugh." Said Silver "Do you _have_ to do that?"

"Oh, be quiet. When you're older and you find someone that you love, you'll do it too." I said while Shane muttered something that sounded strangely like 'Over my dead body'

"Silver, can you go upstairs and get dressed? Take your brother too? Auntie Eve and Uncle Michael will be here soon." She nodded, her face serious with the weight of her task.

"You know, they better not take after their god-parents. I mean I'll love them no matter what, but I'd prefer it if we had a non-bloodsucking family." Said Shane

"You're just jealous because they stay eighteen forever and your 34 and getting older with every second. Hey, is that a grey hair?" I said pointing to a random spot on his head.

"What! No!" he said rushing off to the mirror, while I laughed to myself.

_Ding, dong._ "I'll get it!" exclaimed a blur of black and white that turned out to be Lucy. She was wearing a black skull-print dress and brand new patent boots. I think you can guess where her style inspiration comes from. Speaking of her style inspiration…

"Auntie Eve!" she exclaimed, beaming.

"Auntie Eve, Uncle Michael!" echoed Silver and Alex. Their god-parents walked in, ghostly pale complexions matching exactly.

I embraced them both, then stood back and observed my children.

I love each one of them more than I can say. Yet I still mourn the death of my unborn child. Still cry over that beautiful patchwork quilt. Still have a hole in my heart for the one who never had the chance to live.

"Mommy, are you alright?" Asked Alex, tugging on my sleeve.

"I'm fine Alex. Why don't you take that birthday cake of your uncle Michael?" I said gesturing to the black bat-shaped one he was holding-obviously made by Eve. My children will never see me cry.

_Myrnin_

Fifteen years. Fifteen years I have lived with the guilt. Wallowed in it. Submersed myself in it. Drowned in it. I didn't even know it was possible. My hatred for the boy drove me to it. Looking in through her window, I saw the fabric of her pyjama top pulled taught over her stomach. His hand was resting on the bump.

The magic expelled its self from me, driven by my hatred of the boy. Purple fire ice cold it danced through the air and settled on her stomach, then seeped slowly through her skin. I knew what I had done. I was a murderer. She would never forgive me if she found out.

I live with the guilt, in the hope that one day, someone, somewhere, will take pity on me and end my miserable life.


	7. Perfect

_`Ok guys, I was going to make my last update on 'And then I realised' the 15 years later story, but seeing as so many of you have sent me reviews telling me to keep writing I will make this a little sequel to it. However I would like to warn you this is my VERY LAST update-it's about her pregnancy with her first child, Lucy. Thanks for the support guys and _enjoy_!_

I remember the morning in perfect clarity. _Don't get your hopes up _a part of me had chided, but it was impossible not to. Tentatively I opened one eye a slit to squint at the result.

"Pregnant." I breathed, barely able to believe my eyes. "Shane, I'm pregnant!" I yelled shaking his shoulder. He had picked me up and spun me around in a big circle, whooping in joy all the while. Ever since my miscarriage, a year ago now, we'd been trying for a baby-unsuccessfully I might add. Neither of us had realised that we wanted a child that much until it had been ripped away.

Now, at eight and a half months pregnant, I was sat on the plush sofa in the living room of the glass house, with Shane's head on my lap-his hair tickling my swollen tummy. Suddenly I felt a huge smack against my stomach-from the inside. Shane and I both leapt up-well, he leapt up while I struggled to get of the sofa. I _am_ eight and a half months pregnant after all.

"Whoa. Did you just feel that?" he asked, while I shot him a sarcastic look,

"What? Nooo, of course not. Why would I feel my baby kicking me? I mean sure, you would feel it because it's inside of you-oh, wait a minute…" But our attention was soon diverted from witty sarcasm to me yelping as another kick hammered against the inside of my stomach. Shane's hands flew to the baby bump, and we both made sounds of breathless disbelief as thumps smacked against me. He called down Eve and Michael and they rushed down in under a minute, mussed and half dressed. If by half-dressed you mean Eve in Michaels shirt, and Michael just adorned with a pair of jeans. I think it was pretty obvious what they had been doing.

"Its two o'clock in the afternoon, on a Sunday. Are you animals?" I asked while Eve flushed a brilliant scarlet. Mocking banter was soon pushed aside though as another kick struck against my abdominal. Eve and Michael realised what had happened and quickly placed their hands against my stomach.

A hard kick smacked against me and I felt something wet run down my leg. For half a second I thought 'holy crap did I just wet myself?' before Eve said "Claire, I don't mean to alarm you, but you water just broke."

Huh.

All hell broke loose.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, _oh my god!" _Eve was screaming while she tried to lode me into her hearse. While Shane was alternating between the swear words 'shit' and 'fuck' as my grip on his hand increased to bone-crushingly tight. Michael drove while Shane and Eve sat beside me on the huge bench seat. It was there where I got my first contraction. And oh sweet holy hell there are no curse words strong enough for what I was feeling. I uttered a strained moan as I squeezed Eves hand like the stress ball my Dad had once owned, while Shane hastily sweeped my fringe off my sweaty forehead.

"Someone needs to call my parents." I said around deep breaths. Eve and Shane exchanged a look-a silent debate on who has to call them. Hormones running high I practically screamed "Will someone just ring my fucking parents!" Panicked with my outcry, Shane pulled his cell from his pocket and had a hurried conversation with my parents, informing them that they were about to become grandparents. I was too busy squeezing the hand of Eve who was wincing slightly. After ten agonising minutes we arrived at the hospital.

Shane lifted me out of the car and sprinted to the doors of Morganville's hospital. When the woman at the desk saw me, panting and moaning, she uttered a wide-eyed "Ook, dear we'll get you checked in right away, I take it this young man is the father-" just then Eve, Michael and my Mom and Dad burst through the doors, a mix of stress and panic on their faces. "Only the Father and direct family in the delivery room please." said the woman, her voice mirroring her harassed look. Eve and Michael went to step back but I put an arm out to stop them.

"No. We're all family here." At that, Eve looked close to tears and Michael looked touched.

"I'm sorry, but the room might be a bit full-and overwhelming for you-"

"Listen lady, I am a heavily pregnant, severally hormonal woman. Do not test me. The only thing that's overwhelming me here is the fact that I'm still out here talking to you and not in a delivery room." The woman held her place for a second and a half, but then she crumbled under the weight of my glare.

Five minutes later I was in the delivery room with Eve, Michael, my parents and Shane surrounding me in a tight arc. Suddenly, I gave a moan/scream as another contraction hit me.

"Are you ok?" asked a frantic Shane.

"_DO I LOOK OK? _There's a small human trying to come out of me, and you ask _are you ok? NO I AM NOT FUCKING OK!"_ I screeched at him, while my parents looked scandalised at hearing their daughter swear so colourfully in front of them and Eve laughed at the expression on Shanes face.

"You're crowning," said the nurse while everyone went round to my rear end to look. Some faces held looks of disgust while others held wonder. Shane came round to my side and offered me his hand to hold as the midwife instructed me to start pushing. I'm not sure why I did it. Maybe I wanted him to feel sympathy pain. But as the excruciating pain and effort engulfed me I ignored his hand and grabbed a handful of his hair. For every scream I uttered he had a little 'ow' to accompany it.

"Almost there, one big push." Said the midwife, while I moaned and panted and pushed and Shane bent his head at an awkward angle to avoid major hair pulling. Then a new cry shattered the air, small and beautiful. "Congratulations on a new baby girl." The woman said, wrapping the tiny doll like creature in a towel and passing it to me. I cooed and murmured to the baby girl in my arms, rocking her slowly. When I looked into Shanes eyes and saw every emotion I was feeling inside splayed on his face, I knew every ounce of pain I had suffered through as worth it.

Shane took the baby carefully from my small arms and placed her in his strong ones. I'd never seen him look so…vulnerable, all his emotions right there on his face. He wasn't afraid to let his guard down around her.

While everyone cooed and passed around the baby, Shane and I set our goal to coming up with a name for her. Finally, we settled on Lucy Alyssa Collins. Alyssa was my idea-I wanted to pay respect to her aunt who she would never get to meet.

"Guys, we have something to tell you." Said Eve who was interlocking hands with Michael, "We're moving out." We didn't need to say anything-are expressions were enough. "I know, I know, it's unexpected but you're going to have a baby and we've found this cute place within walking distance and-"

"How can you move out of the Glass House?" I asked addressing Michael "You're the 'Glass'."

"I've already cleared everything with Amelie- it's not the Glass House anymore. It's the Collins House. How could you raise a baby with two other people in the house?" our answer was silence. They we're right.

All of a sudden, little Lucy suddenly broke into a miniature sleepy smile, and I couldn't help smiling back.

_The End._


	8. The bitter taste of revenge

_Hey guys! I KNOW I said the last one would be the final one but I can't resist coming back to it! One condition though! You read my other fan-fic 'And just when I thought I was prepared for anything' too! Deal? Hope you enjoy!_

"Myrnin? Hello, are you in here?" my foot sunk through about an inch and a half of dust as I walked through the broken lab and subconsciously I fingered the silver stake at tucked in my belt. Just before I took another step my phone lit up.

_**Claire, honey, please come home. The kids and I are worried. I know you two were close when he was your boss but he had a mental break down. He's dangerous. Besides what're you going to say to him? Hi Myrnin haven't seen you in fifteen years-how you doing? Please come home, hun. Shane xx.**_

I could sense the persuasion in the text but I shut my phone anyway and continued searching the lab. I could imagine him at home on the sofa, Alex on his lap, his beautiful face lined with worry. That picture alone made me want to get the hell out of there and sprint back to him, but I knew I couldn't. I had to do this.

I took another unsteady step and yelped as something crunched beneath my feet. Blowing the thick duvet of dust off of the ground I realised it was the leg of a spindly chair he had sometimes sat on to read. Peering round, the whole floor seemed to be covered with fragments of broken items. Books, glass beakers you name it.

My brow furrowed and I shone my torch around the small room. Spinning round, something metal blinded me as it reflected the light from my torch. Squinting I realised it was a door handle-the door handle to (if my memory served) Myrnin's bedroom! Careful not to step on any glass (I was only wearing thinly souled trainers after all) I made my way across the room and grasped the door handle. The dusty metal felt like ice on my fingers, and every instinct I possessed was screaming for me to release it. But still, I persevered twisting the door knob hard. Every tiny bit of strength in my body was forcing the door handle round. Slowly, agonisingly, it turned inch by inch until an ear splitting crack was heard and it snapped off all together. One finger at a time, I unclenched my fist and let the handle fall to the floor. Slowly I raised my hand and gave the door a little push letting it swing open.

"Myrnin?" I called, my voice echoing around the small space. And then I saw him. He was curled up in the corner of the room next to his little cot that once upon a time I'd slept in. He was wearing torn up grey trousers and nothing else. I could count his ribs, he was so thin. Not an ounce of fat was on his bones, his arms and legs like twigs. His stomach was practically two-D. He raised his head at my entry and I gasped as I looked at his face. His black slightly curling hair fell to his elbows and tumbled over his frail cheek bones and jaw. But what shocked me most were his eyes. His irises were a shining crimson and looked like they were going to swallow up his pupils, which were the size of pin-pricks.

"You shouldn't have come here, Claire." He croaked his voice cracking.

"It's been fifteen years. _Fifteen years. _Nothing." As I looked at him with fury his eyes slowly filled up. In a flash he was in front of me eyes huge and insane looking.

"I was very bad. Very bad Claire, very bad. You have no idea what I've been through. No idea."

"_I _have no idea what _you've _been through? You have no clue Myrnin! I've had three children. I got married. Oh and did I mention I had a miscarriage?" on that last comment he jerked like I'd electrocuted him.

He sunk to the floor wrapped his thin arms around his legs and whispered "Bad, bad, bad…." Over and over like a mad man.

"Myrnin, what did you do?" I murmured speaking slowly and carefully, like the way I would to Alex when he was confused or angry.

"Bad, bad, bad.."

"Myrnin, answer me." I said, more firmly now.

"I can't Claire. You'd never forgive me. I can't forgive myself, but I can deal with that. I can't handle you hating me." Something started to click. The way he reacted when I'd spoke of miscarriage and the way he spoke, with such guilt and he said I would hate him.

Sinking to the floor I felt myself start to hyperventilate.

"It wasn't a miscarriage was it?" Fat tears rolled down his thin face as he shook his head. "How? How did you do it?"

"I am_ blessed-" _He said it with so much venom that it was clear he didn't feel that he was blessed "-with magic." Suddenly he opened his hand and there was a ball of purple fire sitting there-but I could feel the cold coming off it.

"Why? Why would you kill my child?" I said jaw clenching to fight my tears.

"I loved you for a long time Claire. But you were none the wiser as you went and got engaged to that _boy_. And imagine how I felt when I found out you were carrying _his_ child. I hadn't meant to. The hatred-it forced the magic out of me. I am so sorry."

"That's not good enough!" suddenly I jumped to my feet and pulled my stake from my belt and went for him. In a flash he was on his feet his waxy lips very close to my ear.

"I wouldn't recommend that Claire. You have no idea how hungry I am. Now get out of here before I kill you."

"You killed my child!" I yelled my wrist snaking out-stake in hand. A burst of white hot pain engulfed me as his hand whipped up and caught mine.

"I'm going to give you a countdown. If you don't get out, I'm going to quench the thirst I've been struggling with for fifteen years." I froze unsure of my next move. Once upon a time I wouldn't have given it a second thought, but now I had a husband that loves me and three beautiful children. In a burst of clarity each one of their faces appeared in front of my eyes-and I knew there was no question as to what I would do. I turned and ran. I ran out of the room, out of his lab into the evening air.

But the danger was far from gone, I realised, as an ominous "Ready or not here I come." Sounded from behind me. In a second I was running again, running so fast it felt like my legs were going to fall off. But he was faster. He appeared before me, pale skin glowing in the moonlight. I attempted to run past him but he caught me in the stomach with his arm-sending me flying to the ground.

He lowed himself over me and breathed "Gotcha."

_Like hell you do, _I thought grabbing the silver knife from my pocked and sliding it effortlessly between his ribs-the way he had once taught me to do. He looked down at himself and appeared shocked at the dark red ribbons running down his torso. He made one last feeble attempt at pulling the knife out, before falling to the ground. I stood up and looked down at his frail body, more graceful in death than in life and I felt a tiny part of myself wither and die as he lay there.


End file.
